Ladies, We Must Stop Saying “Those Women”

In the United States women and girls are free to get an education and have a career of their choosing whereas women and girls in other countries are not that fortunate. But why is it that when a woman or young girl is seen working in the Sex Industry in the U.S. we assume it was all her choice and that perhaps it’s a viable job? Look, I know a girl’s gotta eat but why does she have to sell herself to do so? In a country that boasts to be the leader of democracy and freedom for all why would a woman resort to this and why do some of us find that acceptable? The oldest profession? You mean the oldest OPPression. Believe it or not ladies these women are just like us-seriously. They have hopes and dreams, they want a future possibly a husband and a family and yes they want an education and a career. I know it’s hard to believe but not any one of us were made to be used in this way.

There are several factors that may play into how a woman or young girl finds herself in this seedy, sleazy industry. The first one is incest. Incest can start at a very young age where a child doesn’t know right from wrong and is doing what the adult is telling them to do all the while making them believe it is acceptable. This adult could be a parent, the father who consumes large amounts of pornography where very young girls are consistently violated, or a close family member. This can cause the young girl to become promiscuous, through no fault of her own, and look for validation through sexual acts. She will also be desensitized to dehumanizing or violent sex acts because they were embedded in her via porn and the actual act itself. The second is emotional and mental trauma. Mental illness has become a topic of discussion in the United States and it affects large numbers of women and young girls. Bipolar Disorder claims the lives of young women before the age of 25. Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is know to cause havoc with emotions and dysfunctional behavior, two of the most dangerous behaviors are unsafe sex and substance abuse. There’s also suicidal thoughts and intense mood swings. That doesn’t sound like a person who can make good life choices. The third factor is economic instability commonly known as extreme poverty. Contrary to popular belief there are young women out there in this country who are not able to get an education or a decent job through no fault of their own. With hungry children and no place to live you can be sure a bad decision will be made for the sake not being impoverished. This is also attributed to major cuts in social programs that help women, especially single moms get on their feet. Cam anyone say third world country? The fourth thoroughly insidious factor is the force, fraud and coercion of women and girls trafficked and sold as sex slaves in every facet of the sex industry, everywhere possible. Brothels, Strip Clubs, on the Tracks (the Streets), Hotels, Male house parties, etc.

And the last but most important factors all together but equally disturbing are: Misygony, sexual harassment and abuse, violence and sexual violence against women and girls and a growing hate for women as a whole. The numbers are in ladies, from the 2016 presidential election to your friendly religious leaders and society at large. So my question is, if we have all of this against us, why are we against each other? By deeming it okay that a woman is “allegedly” selling herself or is “willingly” in the sex industry and that it’s work just like anything else is the most dangerous and destructive attitude we could possibly have. If we continue to make these viable solutions for women and girls, that’s where they will be told to go instead of an education and a career. There is no such thing as “Those Women” they’re our girls and we need to fight for them and ourselves because realistically the way they are looked at, we are all looked at the same way.

Pornography is Gender Based Violence-It’s Proven

The rumors are true, we are living in a Porn saturated society and it’s literally killing our women and girls. There are 2 types of porn, soft-core porn and Gonzo Porn which is commonly known as hardcore porn. The latter is found in everyday media such as Network & Cable Television, Hollywood Movies, The Music Industry, Comedies (Stand-up, Sitcoms, and Late Night TV), video games, children’s entertainment and the list goes on. But you can still download the more graphic soft-core porn on the internet. Gonzo (Hardcore) Porn is so far only found on the internet and some seedy sex shops, it shows that you can do anything to a woman you want short of killing her. Although, I don’t how ANY woman could survive what is being done to her on a consistent basis by men who are not peddling romance or love but a thorough hate for women and girls. The men that are watching porn hold high positions in government, communities, the labor force, schools, academia, law enforcement, the sciences and every office job you can think of. Which is one of many reasons why women are experiencing high rates of sexual harassment, abuse and exploitation in the workplace and places of education.

The reason that soft-core porn is so prevalent in today’s market is because the Porn Industry is paying millions of dollars to desensitize people to porn through the media and legislation by basically making it acceptable and normal and a form of ‘Freedom of Speech”. As Dr. Gail Dines puts it, 12yr old boys are told that “That’s what men want” when they are innocently led to these porn sites which they were not looking for. A marketing tool that has served the Porn Industry well over the years. As a result of that, young boys are then lured to a site that offers the most graphic, dehumanizing and horrifying sex scenes that no normal person would ever imagine. This easy access and the fact that porn is so normalized, any 12yr old boy will see nothing wrong with it especially if he sees his father watching it. The statistics of grown men, married with families, watching porn is is staggering. Men are lured just as easily as boys are and can actually be conduits for there sons introduction to pornography.

If you look at the images today that are constantly being shoved into the faces of women and girls, you will see that it emulates a pornified behavior. Young girls are drawn to it under the guise of music, fashion and popular culture all industries that porn is working with. Because of this, young girls believe it is okay to be this way, boys will like you, you’ll be popular, all the girls will envy and want to be like you-which is what the Porn Industry is counting on to keep up their supply. But that could not be farther from the truth. The truth about being a “Porn Star” is, your raped and tortured EVERYDAY, your body is riddled with STDs or worse with little or no medical attention, your constantly abused verbally, physically and emotionally. All this for the male audience.

And what do women and young girls want? They want to loved, accepted and respected all of which the Porn Industry does not offer. What they do offer is subservience of the most lascivious kind, to be looked at and treated as not human and used at will for all sorts of perversion. All of this amounts to gender hate which in turn leads to gender based violence. These men and boys are told and shown that there are women and girls out there who really want to be treated in this way and actually like it. As this is being consumed, the more the hatred increases not only for the women in pornography but for every woman a male come in contact with-even their own wives and daughters.

So, how do we stop men and boys from drinking the Koolaid that holds the poison? Well, it seems that when 2 or more women are gathered fighting for their human rights it called “complaining”. But maybe if we have REAL men fighting with us, changing laws, making the clarification between freedom of speech and hate speech working with other men and boys helping to cure them of this disease and bringing them back to humanity, we can make a difference. Putting an end to men and boys watching porn will hit the industry right in their bank account and cut off the oxygen to the head of the octopus whose arms are strangling our culture.