To Decriminalize Or Not To Decriminialize-That Is The Battle

Human Rights Fellow
Founder/Executive Director
BeaSister2aSister

The latest issue right now in the world of human trafficking and prostitution is the decriminalization of men who buy sex and the women who say it’s a viable line of “work”. States are at odds when it comes to this type of legislation because they want to satisfy the masses, be popular, get votes etc. Let’s get one thing straight, decriminalizing sex buyers while fueling demand is not a popularity contest, it’s a human rights issue. Women have and are being put on the shelf with goods and commodities that can be bought or sold at any amount for any man wanting to use her. Giving buyers all access to to the bodies of women and girls will not stop at those who say this is work for them. It will spill out into communities, teenage girls walking home from school will be taunted and harassed mostly by men who are old enough to be their fathers with the fear of rape. They will say it is our right to do what we want with any female in the streets because the law says so. To even think for a second that decriminalization will only be confined to those who buy sex is farcical at best.

The sex trade has many different moving parts and all of them work together to keep women and children in a subservient state to men. All prostitution, porn and sexual exploitation is designed to service the perverse fantasies of men. This is just another fantasy that will come true if decriminalization passes, the ability for men for to buy, force and rape women at their discretion because they can. This will be a very thinly veiled piece of legislation that will make all the other laws against human trafficking obsolete. Laws that were passed helping victims and survivors will no longer be applicable. It won’t stop there, the lines of sexual abuse, assault and rape will be blurred as well. Decriminalization will bring validity to it being a job but will then make it a career choice for all women while erasing real opportunities that will in turn only be given to men or women who they feel don’t fit the physical “mold” for the sex trade.

Have we not learned anything from countries like Germany and Amsterdam where very high volumes of trafficking, rape, violence and murder of women live? Legalizing prostitution and not adopting solutions like the Nordic Model has cost thousands upon thousands of women their lives, and there’s still more. Women in Germany are told to go look for work in the Red Light District because there is no other work for them at the present time. Is this what women in the United States want to be told when they are out looking for work? Is that what you’re fight for? If men get what they want all of those jobs that women used to hold will be gone. There will be no need for marriage or a family when men can get their needs satisfied without familial or marital responsibilities. This is not a small thing and it reaches into every area of people’s lives even into the most intimate places. There will be no turning back from decriminalization it will be the deciding factor if women live or die while disappearing from society all together.

Los Angeles. The porn capital created by the United States of America. Land of the free, home of the brave, enslavement of women. This country did this. America is responsible for putting women and girls all over the world in bondage, torture and slavery and now they want to put it in a pretty package and call it empowerment or choice. This country is failing the young women and taking away their ability to grow into their full potential to pursue careers that feed their passion-the sex industry is not one of them. If lawmakers want to do something good for women, go after the teen magazines that tell girls it’s better to be professional in oral sex than to go to school and do something you love. Sign into law legislation that protects them and gives better choices and options for girls who have no where else to turn to. Decriminalization is a certificate of death signed by people who have been conned into believing this is what’s best. I hope they can live with the increased physical, psychological and emotional damage they will have brought on to so many women who really want to get out.

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Women And Revolution is blog designed to raise the issues that are affecting women all over the world while giving it journalistic value. W.A.R is a division of BeaSister2aSister a 501(c)3 non profit that helps survivors of human trafficking, domestic violence, exploitation and abuse break the cycle of interdependency and become self sustainable. if you would like to earn more you can visit our website at http://www.beasister2asister.org or you can email us at info@beasister2asister.org. If you are interested in seeing women and girls everywhere break free from interdependency, please consider donating online as a one time or sustainable donor. We are committed to seeing every woman walk in total freedom.

BeaSister2aSister

“Being Accountable For Every Woman Around The Globe.”

Prostitution & Drugs vs Human Trafficking

Human Rights Fellow
Founder/Executive Director
BeaSister2aSister

When we talk about prostitution people will more often then not think of it as a choice based only on the belief that she is willing and likes it. When we talk about human trafficking we understand that it is a process of force, fraud and coercion as well as grooming and the breaking down of will. These seem like two totally different situations but really, they’re not that different. The decision of prostitution is made because of a circumstance whether it be poverty, lack of sustainable employment, mental illness or addiction. Whatever that thing is, it’s a coercion into prostitution. Women don’t inherently want to do it, it’s not a career path, it’s either a means for survival or feeding an addiction that has overcome their lives and now they are slaves to it. Much like human trafficking, women and girls are slaves to men who mean to do them great harm, so the same with prostitution. In this sense they are slaves but not only to men but to their circumstance or their addiction.

The pathway into drug addiction varies from female to female but once they’ve gotten to the point where they can’t live without it, their decisions become darker and darker. These are not willing participants, ladies of the evening or the happy hooker that is loving life serving men’s perverse sexual needs. These women are victims too, maybe not in the same way human trafficking survivors were but there is an element of sexual exploitation and abuse. Instead of money exchanging hands, it’s their body that is used for monetary gain in order to feed the habit they can’t break. Eventually they will be found having overdosed and written off as just another dead prostitute with no name and no humanity. If we are going to remember the survivors or those that didn’t survive being trafficked then why can’t we do the same for women who were willing victims to a drug addiction that they never intended or are trying to survive? We can’t favor one because it’s the cool hot issue and celebrities have become advocates against just to boost their public image. Especially when most of Hollywood glorifies prostitution. These are all women fighting for their lives in one form or another and to say that one group deserves more attention than the other is categorizing them into a marginal frame that sounds good to society at large while shaming and stigmatizing them.

Women are chastised much more when it comes to drug addiction because it leads them to a life of prostitution filled with sexual abuse and exploitation just to feed the need. In this instance women are judged harshly and are always looked at as a prostitute not worthy of help, healing or services. They are re-victimized and re-traumatized and most times end up back on the streets. Human trafficking victims suffer similarly when they also experience re-victimization and re-traumatization by programs or agencies that claim to help but keep them interdependent only to cut them off and lead them back into the streets. If we stop categorizing and separating and look at every case with a no judgement and neutral prospective we will see that it’s all intertwined in the spider web of addiction and sexual slavery. Every woman that you see out on the streets selling herself or being sold is because of a circumstance, addiction or force, fraud and coercion. It really doesn’t matter how, what matters is that we see them all the same. Their situations may seem different but the suffering, exploitation and abuse look exactly the same. Let’s stop glorify one while being shocked and angry at the other because if the sex trade doesn’t differentiate, then we shouldn’t either.

Thanks for reading!! If you like this blog, please share it or subscribe to it.

Women And Revolution is blog designed to raise the issues that are affecting women all over the world while giving it journalistic value. W.A.R is a division of BeaSister2aSister a 501(c)3 non profit that helps survivors of human trafficking, domestic violence, exploitation and abuse break the cycle of interdependency and become self sustainable. if you would like to earn more you can visit our website at http://www.beasister2asister.org or you can email us at info@beasister2asister.org. If you are interested in seeing women and girls everywhere break free from interdependency, please consider donating online as a one time or sustainable donor. We are committed to seeing every woman walk in total freedom.

BeaSister2aSister

“Being Accountable For Every Woman Around The Globe.”

The Unending Scandal of OXFAM

Human Rights Fellow
Founder/Executive Director
BeaSister2aSister

NGOs and Non Profits are entities designed to help people locally, nationally and globally. In some cases millions of dollars are funneled into these organizations with the belief that it serves the greater good. Who really knows where the money goes, all we see is children getting clean water or food, women rescued from being victims of war and conflict, services and resources getting to those who are lacking because of political unrest. But when an NGO who claims to be helping and supporting women and children are the very entity that is harming them, we must draw the line and call it out. Oxfam’s scandal in Haiti that uncovered sexual abuse by it’s aids workers of women and children cost the organization 7,000 cancelled donations by steady donors forcing them to make a £16 million cut in aid projects. Caroline Thomson, the Chairwoman of Trustees, said that Oxfam has workers risking their lives in the most lawless countries like the Democratic Republic of the Congo. The same Country that saw UN Peacekeepers joining in the rapes of Sudanese women claiming that all the men in uniform were committing these injustices and there was so much distress on the woman they wouldn’t be able to tell the difference. The distinction was made and there was an international outcry for justice to be served. We’re still waiting.

Making the claim that because of civil unrest it’s hard for anyone to know what’s happening and therefore it’s not our fault is not an excuse to cover up rape and sexual assault just because you don’t want to lose donors. The Charity Commission is taking the allegations by victims in Haiti very seriously while the NGO is thinking about their donors and their reputation. When the beneficiaries themselves raised complaints, Oxfam GB along with the UN removed their aid workers and peacekeepers from having close contact with their victims in the camps and repatriated them back into the conflict zones where they can go unnoticed. This was done to protect their colleagues and further protect the organization. The charity Commissions report sums up the poor investigation Oxfam and how they put vulnerable children at risk with staff that was supposed to protect them.

Oxfam in Haiti

Only now is Oxfam coming to terms that they can no longer hide the pain and the same they have caused in Haiti and other countries. So many of us work hard to make sure that women and children are protected from violence, sexual violence and rape, big NGOs like Oxfam are making it increasingly difficult for the rest of us who are not abusing women and children to educate people on why we need their help. They are desensitizing society at large as to what it means to support this type of work. Can they trust us? Where is the money really going? Why are there so many executives with high salaries and people are still suffering? Doing human rights work is not the same as working for a multinational corporation, there shouldn’t be a six or more figure salary complete with a high end lifestyle. This is a sacrifice, a willingness to let go of material things to help and speak out against the suffering of others in a selfless manner. I’ve said this before, if you are going into the NGO or Non Profit sector for the money, you are in the wrong industry.

Donors are always the last to know because they see the big name and all the favor they have and assume this is a credible organization doing great work. They are kept in the dark about unsavory practices and systematic abuses. Even the biggest human rights organization in the world, the UN is not with out it’s own scandals and sicknesses but we still have the Commission on the Status of Women there every March. We need to stop looking away when these things happen, giving money to NGOs that will continue to perpetuate the cycle of abuse will only exacerbate the issue further. We have to see that something this big and well funded is in danger of being run as a corporate entity and not as a place that is working for the people who have no one to turn to. Unfortunately there will be more of these stories rearing their ugly heads with other NGOs and Non Profits. But for those of us who know this work, do it with respect and dignity while trying to live on a strict low income, will have the last say and be the voice that has been silenced for so many by the privatization of human rights work.

Thanks for reading!! If you like this blog, please share it or subscribe to it.

Women And Revolution is blog designed to raise the issues that are affecting women all over the world while giving it journalistic value. W.A.R is a division of BeaSister2aSister a 501(c)3 non profit that helps survivors of human trafficking, domestic violence, exploitation and abuse break the cycle of interdependency and become self sustainable. if you would like to earn more you can visit our website at http://www.beasister2asister.org or you can email us at info@beasister2asister.org. If you are interested in seeing women and girls everywhere break free from interdependency, please consider donating online as a one time or sustainable donor. We are committed to seeing every woman walk in total freedom.

BeaSister2aSister

“Being Accountable For Every Woman Around The Globe.”

Why Do we Sometimes chose unhealthy Relationships To Healthy Ones?

Samantha Inests
Human Rights Fellow
Founder/Executive Director
BeaSister2aSister

We are all guilty of liking someone who we know isn’t good for us but the physical attraction can outweigh the reality check we get when the physical turns ugly. In our quest for finding the “right man” or our soul mate to share our lives with we run into quite a lot of impostors along the way. It’s not always easy to discern who is and who isn’t the right one but instead of jumping in with both feet and eyes closed, we should be asking the right questions and taking time that might be lost once you come to the realization that this should have never been, but by that time, it’s too late.

You should ask yourself do you want a man whose real or one that is fictional? Prince Charming, Knight in Shining Armor and Hero are all characters in a story book-not real men. Real men are flawed, imperfect and don’t always save the day, just as we as women have our own flaws and imperfections but how do we know which one of those flaws or imperfections that we see in men won’t turn into pain, regret and harm? It can be difficult because men can wear just as many masks as women can and to try and see behind it is a true challenge. I have seen a lot of my girlfriends go through really unhealthy relationships, some violent some more verbal and controlling than physical, but most will stay. Why? Because when we look at ourselves in the mirror we don’t see someone whose worthy of a healthy loving relationship with a person who is right for us and who will love us for who we are. Maybe it’s what happened in the past that is now rearing it’s ugly head into our present and future or a dysfunctional upbringing that caused us to believe that we should feel lucky any man would want us or watching our mothers get put down and beat down by the only image of what a man should be, shapes our future partners which leads to more unhealthy relationships with men.

Culturally speaking, many women are forced into marriages that often times than not turn extremely abusive and end up fatal. These women don’t have the choice of deciding what kind of relationship they want, they take what’s handed to them by their family. In the patriarchal system of their beliefs, women are seen as property that cannot make decisions for themselves and therefore are like children that need to be controlled by men. It’s a fair point to say that all of their relationships are unhealthy and may stay that way. For those of us who have the freedom to at least decide who we want to be with is a daunting task but can be overcome when we see ourselves as valuable. If we give into familial bondages that caused us to feel unworthy or societal pressures to look a certain way then we have lost our potential and will never thrive the way were were meant to.

The media’s mainstream harm of women through pornography or porn-like situations and images have made it extremely hard for women to appreciate themselves let alone find a man that will. This type of negative imagery can destroy the self-esteem and confidence that women desire to have more of and in turn causes them to be more critical of themselves and never want to strive for more or even think they deserve better. The man of their choosing will reflect that. If we focus not on the things that will hurt us but the things that will empower us, then we can move forward with a healthy attitude and attract healthy relationships while being able to spot the ones are harmful to us physically, mentally and emotionally. When we let go of what was done to us, our culture and our upbringing, we can begin to love and value ourselves while healing from past wounds. If we make this shift, everything else will fall into place as we continue to change our self perception and the right relationship will present itself.

Thanks for reading!! If you like this blog, please share it or subscribe to it.

Women And Revolution is blog designed to raise the issues that are affecting women all over the world while giving it journalistic value. W.A.R is a division of BeaSister2aSister a 501(c)3 non profit that helps survivors of human trafficking, domestic violence, exploitation and abuse break the cycle of interdependency and become self sustainable. if you would like to earn more you can visit our website at http://www.beasister2asister.org or you can email us at info@beasister2asister.org. If you are interested in seeing women and girls everywhere break free from interdependency, please consider donating online as a one time or sustainable donor. We are committed to seeing every woman walk in total freedom.

BeaSister2aSister

“Being Accountable For Every Woman Around The Globe.”

Religious Leaders & The Pill

Human Rights Fellow
Founder/Executive Director
BeaSister2aSister

Sometimes you can’t talk about abortion with talking about the pill aka birth control or as some of the religious hierarchy call it-“The Abortion Pill”. The church and society at large who put organized religion above everything demonize women who use birth control citing that they hate children, babies and motherhood. Nothing is further from the truth. Women going on birth control is largely viewed as a women who doesn’t want children but that’s not always the case and as we’ve seen no contraceptive is 100% full proof in preventing pregnancy. Using the pill doesn’t mean you goal is to not have children, it could be tied to a menstrual issue like never ending bleeding way past your period that can lead to severe anemia or if not treated can be fatal. It can also help to shrink cysts in the ovaries or uterus that can be cancerous. Unfortunately these topics are never discussed.

I remember the first time I went on the pill. It wasn’t because I didn’t want to get pregnant or end up as a single mom, it was because I had a very unhealthy menstrual cycle which led to polyps that in turn led to a never ending menstrual cycle which left me scared and weak. I had no idea what was happening to me because I never experienced it before. I went to countless doctors (when I had insurance) to have tests done and everything seemed fine, except I couldn’t stop bleeding. Finally I couldn’t just sit there so I took myself to the emergency room where the nurses where caring and understanding to my fears and assured me everything was going to be okay. After laying in a hospital bed for what seemed like an eternity, a white male doctor came over to me, looked at my chart, made a face said “You have an irregular period, just go to your OBGYN and have her put you on birth control to regulate it.” It was as if I was a waste for time for him but to me I thought I was going to die. So I went to my gynecologist and told her what happened, she was less than pleased with that doctor and said “I’m not going to just throw pills at it if it’s something more serious”. So more tests, just to make sure, and a low dosage of birth control was prescribed for me.

Once I went on pill things changed, the bleeding ceased and I felt normal again. I wasn’t going to die, I will live. The reason why I say that is because women’s reproductive rights have become a criminal issue in this country to the point where women are practically dying for it. When religious leaders are part of the decision making process on women’s bodies you can be sure the outcome is less than female friendly. The ideology that women should just deal with it and if they lose their life then it must be God’s will. I can assure you it’s not. It was God that opened up a way for me to stop bleeding as I’m sure he has for many women, man twists it so he can have control and regulate what woman can and can’t do with her body. Check your faith gentlemen, no where in the bible does it say that a woman shall be ruled by a man and not have full autonomy. Stop using God as a tool to hate on women. It is a human right to be able to have access to comprehensive reproductive healthcare, do we need a UN charter stating that to legitimize it? Language is a powerful thing and when used improperly can cause misconceptions and miscommunications that have dire consequences. Maybe if we change birth control to female wellness care we wouldn’t be attacked so much, but I’m sure they’ll find a way.

The bottom line is the pill still exists thankfully, and many women of faith still use it for various reasons other than they are trying to prevent getting pregnant. It’s not evil or going against the word of God, it’s taking care of yourself so that you can have healthy children when you’re ready or taking care of an issue that can lead to further problems later down the line. I will never apologize for using the pill to help me feel better and be healthier and neither should you.

Thanks for reading!! If you like this blog, please share it or subscribe to it.

Women And Revolution is blog designed to raise the issues that are affecting women all over the world while giving it journalistic value. W.A.R is a division of BeaSister2aSister a 501(c)3 non profit that helps survivors of human trafficking, domestic violence, exploitation and abuse break the cycle of interdependency and become self sustainable. if you would like to earn more you can visit our website at http://www.beasister2asister.org or you can email us at info@beasister2asister.org. If you are interested in seeing women and girls everywhere break free from interdependency, please consider donating online as a one time or sustainable donor. We are committed to seeing every woman walk in total freedom.

BeaSister2aSister

“Being Accountable For Every Woman Around The Globe.”